some old some new

[75series3]

The South's Gonna Rise again!



Tennessee

The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he

decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into

his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Tennessee and I

need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you

take off?"



The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my

earrings."





Alabama

A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the

day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the

weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked.



"Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail,"

the successful hunter replied.



"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired.



"A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal

Henry!"





Louisiana

A senior at LSU was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I

hope to be in Louisiana." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in

Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the

rest of the civilized world.





Mississippi

The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his

buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"



Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?"



The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got his license number."





Georgia

A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-75. The trooper asked,

"Got any I. D.?"



The driver replied, "Bout whut?"





North Carolina

A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road,

and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it.



Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he

drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the

fellow what the problem was.



The man replied, "I have a flat tire."



The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"



The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the

front and flares in the back. Hey, it don't make sense to me neither."





And this from South Carolina



"You can say what you want about the South, but I ain't never heard of

anyone retiring to the North!

[Dan Erickson]

[Series 3 guy]

Thats funny!!!!!!!!

[CarolinaHottie]

Those were great

I love being a southern girl - at least we all have a sense of humor

[JungleRR]

LOL! those are awesome!